Conflict and the Steps to Resolve It
The simplest definition of conflict is, "competitive or opposing action of incompatibles." When conflict happens, what can be done to find resolution so both parties can move forward either in meeting and supporting organizational requirements or to simply go their separate ways without it escalating to another level. It can be difficult as we all have our own perspectives of how we approach challenges. In trying to engage positively and productively when faced with conflict, here are some proactive steps one can take:
Engage with Growth Mindset - Dr. Carol Dweck said it right that when you engage with a growth mindset, you place yourself in a position of thinking about what is the best outcome as it relates to the organization and not to your personal needs. As you engage on what the organization needs or what could be a mutual and beneficial outcome (win-win), you also begin to analyze with integrity next steps that do not necessarily conform or comfort your ego.
Empathize with the Other Side - Part of a growth mindset also means to identify where the other party is coming from to include what is important to them. This will then lead to how your solution compares with theirs in terms of functionality and value proposition. In some cases, empathizing helps remove your bias and the minutiae in the mind preventing you from thinking those next win-win steps.
Communicate with Your EQ – The goal of communication is mutual understanding. In a conflict, it can be exceedingly difficult as your emotions may be taking the best of you. Knowing your emotional quotient (EQ) which is being aware of you and the triggers of an unplanned reaction, can help in achieving resolution. Regardless if the other side engages with EQ or not, you do! This could help mitigate the challenge as opposed to resolving it. However, any challenge or conflict that you can walk away from with your positive personal brand intact is still a good and acceptable result.
Identify Next Steps - Engaging a conflict with your emotions can trick you in believing that it is all about the quick-win when, you both lose. A conflict in either the workplace or at home should never elevate to the point where dignity and respect is degraded. If it starts to percolate to the “danger-zone,” simply excuse yourself from that situation and identify another option with the intention of supporting the possible best option. Remember, in most situations there will always be options as we need our EQ to help us with identifying those positive win-wins.
We all come with what we have identified as good intentions with the objective of trying to solve, resolve or mitigate challenges we face. Conflict is inevitable. However, you can overcome these challenges and learn from them for the next time. I would love to hear how you approach conflict and, your insight in how you achieve those win-win results. So please share. Until the next time!
